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I’ve never read The Scarlet Letter but I’m beginning to relate to it a bit too much for my liking.

Five or six months ago I believed I was given a second chance with someone who I used to beg the universe to let me speak to again…..now? Well, now I shown why I am rarely ever wrong when it comes to people choosing cruelty over love.


Having you’re wife choose someone else and tell you it’s you’re fault will alter even the softest person. At least it did for me. Then to have even more of that type of pain be done once you’ve shared exactly just what that did? They were right all along, I deserve so much more than petty jealousy when they are the ones who built a fake future in my wild, colorful, loving, soft heart. I learned through my own mistakes that love does not threaten. 


In fact: 


“ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”


While others may say you play the victim, a good heart always carries the truth. And the truth is, her eyes sparkled when she laughed. Her voice was music to my tired soul. Her strength rivaled any man. Her hands, though rough from life, were soft enough to rock babies to sleep. And I got to experience one of the greatest loves anyone could have. 


All my chapters are finished when it comes to her. You cannot heal in the place that made you sick. And I deserve a soft love. Not one that spills angry tears from my heart. Not one who hears countless excuses in my ears. Not one that says words filled with hurt and jealousy. She will never understand the love I carry for her. So, just like four years past, I will keep quiet and hope she’s happier without my presence. 


Access denied.



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